Letter to my baby girl

When my oldest brother graduated high school my Mom gave him a letter.  This letter was one that she wrote to all of us when we were little.  She then sealed the envelopes, put them in lock box, and waited for a special time to give them to us.  So since Austin is three years older than me I knew mine would be coming when I graduated high school or went off to college.  I got this letter a couple weeks before I went off to IU and it was very special to me then and is still special to me.  It is part of a scrap book that I made as a project I had to do my senior year.  I love doing special things for people that really mean something and when I started Lanie's blog it was more for family just to keep updated with our little bug, but it has turned into something special that I can't wait to give to Lanie one day.  So for her last post I am copying my Mom and writing her a letter only in electronic form.  Her blog will be turned into a book and given to her during a special time in her life.  Not really sure when that will be yet, but I think the moment will present it's self and I will know.  Of course I won't forget about Zoe she will get something special too! 

Lanie Bug,
    
      You are such an amazing little girl and from the second you came into this world bright eyed and alert I knew you had my heart.  I never knew I could love something so much and so quick.  You are two years old going on fourteen! You are so strong willed, independent, adventurous, silly, and sweet.  I love it when we read books before bed and you wrap your little arms around my neck and tell me you love me.  It really does make anything that happened that day go away because in that moment everything is perfect.  You love your Daddy so much! When he comes home from work your face lights up and you always run to him with open arms.  I am pretty sure you have had him wrapped around your finger since the moment he laid eyes on you. I love how he will wrestle with you, play horsey, and have a tea party all in one afternoon.  You recently became a big sister and even though you are learning how to share everything from your toys to Mommy and Daddy's attention you are doing a great job and I can see how much you love baby Zoe.  You always want to give her kisses and you have to know where she is at all times just to make sure she is alright. I love watching you grow each day and love each new phase that we get the privilege as your parents to be a part of. You love playing with your cousins and you have plenty to play with! Your Mimi is one of your favorite people and you melted your Papa's heart the first time he held you.  Your Grandma Sandy lights up with joy every time we visit and your Papa Dick loved to cuddle you when you were little.  All your Aunts and Uncles love you very much! You are fearlessly independent and even though sometimes now that drives me crazy I know it will be one of your strong traits as you get older. You are our first born and everything we do is trial and error! Being a parent is one of the hardest jobs ever, but also the most rewarding!  I love your smile, your little laugh, and your never ending questions.  I have prayed for you since the moment I knew we were expecting you.  I pray that God protects you, guards your heart, and just like the veggie tales song we sing in the car I pray that Jesus lives in your heart.  I pray for the woman you will become and that you will always make choices that would make not only us proud, but your heavenly father proud.  I pray for the man that will one day ask your Dad for your hand in marriage and that he loves God just as much you do. I pray for so many things, but above all I pray that you are happy.  I have a favorite poem that I always share with my students by a poet named Sarah Kay. The poem is titled if I should have a daughter and I bought you the book and read it to you about once a week because the poem really wraps up what I want for you in life, but there is one section that I love more than anything. 

"I'll tell her that this world is made out of sugar.
it can crumble so easily but don’t be afraid to stick your tongue out & taste it.
“baby,” i’ll tell her “remember your mama is a worrier
but your papa is a warrior & you are the girl with small hands
& big eyes who never stops asking for more.”
remember that good things come in threes
& so do bad things & always apologize when you've done something wrong
but don’t ever apologize for the way your eyes refuse to stop shining.
your voice is small but don’t ever stop singing." 

I can't wait to continue this journey with you because if the first two years are any clue to what the rest will be we are in for a wild ride.  We won't always agree on things and I am sure there will be times you hate me and times I want to lock myself in the bathroom and scream or sit with a glass a of wine trying to tune out you and your sister fighting over a pair of shoes, but I wouldn't change a thing and I thank God every day for bringing you into my life my little Lanie Bug :) 

Love, 

Mommy